Again, it's one of those days where I get totally "emo".
It's a really really saddening thing.
Yesterday, I did my PP1 Dispensing Test.
Well, I was rather confident I would say, I finished preparing all my products, and completed writing the paperwork by 4.30pm. (while the exam ends at 5pm)
So, I had an extra 30mins to spare.
I was sitting around doing practically nothing, just browsing through my worksheet again.
Then, the lecturer announced that we should put our suppositories inside the darn fridge.
Well, brilliant me didn't think of putting the suppositories in the fridge at all. (yes, I am dumb in that sense. I thought the darn cocoa butter would harden by itself at room temperature like the previous suppositories which we did in class.)
Anyways, to cut a long story short, my darn suppositories (which are intended for rectal use only) looked like SHIT.
Yes..it looked so darn much like shit, that I cursed shit while I was popping out the suppositories from their mould. (Suppositories are like mini-popsicles or agar. You prepare the mixture and pour into the mould, wait for it to harden and ta-daa..you'll get a mini-bullet like thing which is supposed to be shoved up the patient's ass.)
Anyways, I cursed shit, not once, not twice, but 5 times or more, while my benchmates were there writing up their paperwork. I obviously distracted them, and I do feel guilty about it. But nevertheless, during that moment of "shitty-ness" I was oblivious to the fact.
Although I did manage to "beg" for 4 suppositories from other students who were smart enough to put their suppositories in the fridge, it wasn't a perfect suppository. Well, I am more than thankful that there were ppl who were generous enough to spare me some of it, but I am upset at the lecturer for not informing my class, while he informed the other class, MUCH earlier...like almost at the beginning of the class.
I tell you it was. Or maybe I'm just being paranoid again. wth.
Anyways, then today. I decided to go for swimming practice.
Brilliant. I dived into the pool like a 10ton slab which went "SPLAT" as it hit the water. The rest told me that my dive sounded like I suffered severe pain while diving in. Well, it did. But I doubt as much as they imagined.
Back to being emo, I was back in my apartment, almost alone, except for the fact that the other girls were out in Mid, and still are, while the daddy of the house went clubbing. I do feel bad about left out from the clubbing activity, but wth, I thought I wouldn't care less. But I do. Meh.
I feel like a complete selfish person. My bf said he wanna study and do his report so he couldn't come over, but guess what, he's out having dinner with his friendS. Ya. Imagine that.
So here I am, feeling left out and alone and god-knows what other pent up anger I have in me.
I need meditation, or something to keep me from crying alone. Pathetic-nya.